Mike Needs a Life Blog Reposts – Part 22

June 22, 2009
My lovely Government Employee Friday.

Last Friday I walked a couple blocks to the courthouse to apply for a new social security card so I could go into the Workforce offices to meet up with a career counselor. I hit the front step and saw the sign “no cellphones in the building”. Sigh. Walked back to the apartment, dropped off my phone, and walked back. I ask the security guard which office I go to, he points down the hall. Cool.

I walk into the little office, and there’s no one in there, so I sit down in the chair opposite the little window, which behind sits the social security card lady. She looks at me, and frostily asks if I’d taken a number. I looked around to make sure that I’d not missed a few people waiting in front of me.. of course the room was still empty. I now noticed the little kiosk by the door, and told her that I’d not yet taken a number, but I could remedy that! I got up, took two steps, hit a couple buttons, and out popped a slip of paper with my number on it. The moment the paper spit out of the slot, she says “I can help you right here sir!” now happy, and all smiles that I had observed the proper etiquette.. you gotta love government employees.

During the course of our interchange, she noticed my address, and informed me that she had lived in that very apartment between 1987 and 1980, and had I seen the ghost yet? I told her I hadn’t yet seen any ghost, but I’d keep my eyes open. Apparently the original owner of the home was Dr Plummer, the local physician at the Flemming St Hospital right behind the house. He’d shot himself in the head upon learning that he had cancer. Crazy. I’ll be sire and relate any spectral sightings if perchance the find Dr decides to show himself.

After receiving my temporary card, I headed out to the Local Drivers License office over on the south end of the island. I walked in, went thru the empty waiting room right into a little room with a counter and three old women behind it. One portly old lass looked up at me and asked if I’d taken a number.. Again with the fucking numbers! There’s not a damned soul in this place. I walked back out to the waiting room took my number, then went back to the counter. I looked up at the digital readout number-clicker thingy hanging on the wall, the wire hanging from it wasn’t connected to anything, and the face was dark. I had to laugh, I handed the old woman my number and she asked if she could help me.. I told her I needed a drivers license, and she said of course! Fantastic. She pulled me up in the computer. I was surprised she wasn’t using a typewriter or something considering the state of the digital readout on the wall. She then informed me I needed a power bill for proof of residence. I told her that I’d only been there for a week, and I had yet to receive a power bill. She told me that a copy of the lease would suffice, and when I came back with that she’d be happy to help me, and that I wouldn’t have to wait in line or take a number again. Well thank god for small favors.

I went back to the apartment, got the lease, went back to the place, and of course there were now like 5 people waiting in the waiting room. I walked through the waiting room lease in hand, and wouldn’t you know it, my old woman was gone and some other old biddy had taken her seat. This old gal wasn’t havin’ any of my story about not having to take a number, so I had to go out once more and retrieve myself yet another god damned number. Eventually, about 20 minutes later I had myself a gen-u-ine Key West Drivers Licence. Now off to the South Florida Workforce offices to meet up with my Job Developer.

I show up 10 minutes early as directed and give the odd old woman at the counter my name, and tell her that I’m there to see Jeremy, we had a meeting at 2:00. She seemed bewildered that I had come in of my own accord without having gotten a letter telling me to report to them. I assure her that I did indeed have an appointment, and that I’d talked to Jeremy on the phone just the day before. She smiles and tells me that Jeremy is not yet back from lunch, and that he should be back in no time. I thanked her and had a seat. Wow, the people in and out of that place are definitely an interesting bunch, I sat and read my kindle and waited. About 2:15 I hear her call Jeremy on his cell phone.. apparently from what I could hear, he was at the dr’s office. Of course. In about 15 more minutes she came out and sat next to me, and asked if I’d scheduled an appointment with anyone, I told her once again that I’d talked to Jeremy on the phone the day before and he’d told me to come in at 2:00. She looked pretty flustered. She told me that no one back there knew anything about it, and that Jeremy was at a professional conference.. hahaha, nice. I told her that was fine, I’d call back and make another appointment. She still didn’t seem to believe that I’d actually made an appointment, she then whispered to me that he was at the dr’s office. No Kidding. Too funny.

All in all it was a very interesting day.