About Me

What? I’m laid Off? . . . Key West Here I Come!

Welcome to Conch Tales!

My name is Mike. I’m on a mission, and this is my blog.

My mission is thus: to reach a simpler, more fulfilling state of existence.

And a sailboat, let’s not forget the sailboat. Never. Forget. the Sailboat.

At first blush, this may sound like an easy mission, but I’m here to tell you that undoing 20 years of corporate brainwashing is no task for the feint of heart – sometimes it scares the hell out of me, and I’m a professional. It’s like when you finally decide to allow yourself to be free from an abusive relationship – you have to learn to value your own self-worth all over again.

This is not a travel blog.

I’m not here to tell you what restaurants and bars to visit. No one pays me to visit their bars or restaurants and say nice things. That would defeat the whole purpose. There are a great many websites out there already doing just that. A couple are great, most suck. The ones I like, I have linked in my links bar.

I’m simply here to chronicle my personal journey of deprogram-i-nation through my experiences living as a conch-in-training here in key west. There are no Zagat ratings on this site… or mature adults for that matter, so if I offend you, let me apologize in advance. Actually.. I’m done apologizing, suck it up!

But… I’m determined.

And I’m tired of living just to slog through my days making other people rich, enforcing their corporate agenda, attending their team meetings, touching bases, shifting gears… you get the picture… Is this really what life is all about? I used to think so, but now I’m not so sure anymore… I think you can keep your Kool Aid, Corporate America, I’m not so thirsty anymore!

The older I get, the less time I feel that I have to futz about doing things that don’t enrich my life in some way, and I guess I’ve reached my tipping point. Living by someone else’s corporate guidelines never did a whole lot to enrich my life, what about yours? It may enrich our wallets, but that’s a poor tradeoff for happiness, and in this economy perhaps not the best investment of our time.

So This site is my adventure in simplification.

I’m furiously working to deconstruct the monumental corporate nightmare that my life has become over the last 2 decades. Sometimes it’s pretty painful, all this growing. But nothing good ever comes easy, and I always did like doing things the hard way!

Part of my goal in this personal therapy experiment is to hit every bar in Key West and live to write about it. (This is about as lofty as a goal gets, because you can’t hurl a flip-flop in this town without hitting a bar).

Along the way I’m searching for inspiration in the food, the coffee, the cool historical landmarks, the friendly people,  the warm tropical breeze, and of course the ghosts of this crazy, eclectic, wonderful island – Searching for spirits with spirits in hand, if you will. I love me a good ghost story.  Maybe they’ll have some eternal wisdom to impart upon this weary soul…

But In the immortal words of Frank Zappa, who really gives a fuck anyway?

I’m here for all those folks who can’t be here to enjoy this great place with me – friends, family, strangers, playboy bunnies… Let me be your liver, your eyes, your ears.. all of this is for nothing without people interacting with one another here in this virtual space. So come on! Let’s go grab a drink! Fantasy Fest is right around the corner, and we don’t wanna be caught with our pants down!