Archive for April, 2010

The Red Ribbon Bed Race 2010

We ventured out Saturday morning at about 10:00 AM, after dragging our worn-out asses out of bed. Trying desperately to shake off the previous night’s alcoholic indiscretions, we boldly opened the door and walked into the bright morning light of another day in the Conch Republic. There was after all a Conch Crawl to attend!

We walked down to Green street, and met up with a couple friends at the Official Conch Republic Crawl tent on the corner of Duval to buy t-shirts and get our punch cards. Shaking off the last of our trepidation, we steeled our wills and waked across the street to enter the first bar on the crawl, Guy Harvey’s…  Well, first bar for us. This was a different pub crawl than most, as there was no one large group wandering from bar to bar.. you just made your own way in whatever order you liked. Not really what we were expecting, but hey.. we’d bought our t-shirts, and we were going to do our best!

From there we hit Schooner Wharf, 801 Bourbon, and the Bull where we figured it’d be just about time for the bed races to begin.

Turns out the races were running a little late, or we were a little early.. (who can keep track of time around this place?), so we left The Bull and went to Rick’s to get our next bar crawl rum drink. We eventually wound up in front of the Red Garter when the races started.

What fun! I’m definitely building a bed and entering it next year. I’m not sure if I’ll be able to make it running the 4 blocks down the street though, I may just have to be the eye candy in the bed while I have my star athletic crew push me to victory.

After the races we went to the grand opening party at Ilona’s Garden Cafe on Applerouth Lane right off Duval. We’d been there once before during the last big pub crawl for St. Patty’s day, they were one of the stops on the crawl that day. As before the food was fantastic! It’s a really cool new place, be sure and check it out if you get the chance. They have a really nice outdoor eating area, and a cozy little bar. I’m definitely adding this place to my list of places to eat at soon.

When we were done stuffing our faces with delicious goulash and other fantastic things I don’t even know the names of, we’d decided we just didn’t have the energy to head back to Schooner Wharf for the Pirates Party and Pig Roast. The sun and the booze and the food were all working furiously to bring us down. So what do you do at a time like that? Go see a movie! We went up to new town and spent a couple hours in a dark, cool theater watching ‘Kick Ass’ and snarfing cokes like we had just walked the Gobi.

Even though we missed the Pirates Party, and the subsequent Pig Roast, I really had a great day. I couldn’t have asked for much more. It’s all about good food, good friends, a cool city to wander around in, transvestites pushing beds down the street, topless, sunburnt, fat men sweating and chuffing beer from metal cans, a drunk skank stumbling in front of the racing beds as she tries to fumble open her little can of amyl nitrate for a huff while trying to keep her braless flapjack titties in her shirt and failing… In short, it’s all about Paradise!

I’d like to say I’m not an old fart and can power through these 4 day celebrations Key West is famous for, but I’d be lying. I’m good for about two days of that kind of high activity, then it’s time for a week of down time! That’s OK though, we can’t all be young and spry… or even close. I’ll be on my couch in the fetal position for the next few days, but by the weekend I’ll be good as new. After all I gotta be ready for the next set of fun Key West activities that I’m sure are awaiting us.

I realize that I’d make a horrible news journalist because I just can’t seem to remember all the proper names and such for these events, or bring myself to look them all up. Many of them, if not all of them are for some charity or another, and I’d be remiss if I didn’t at least try to promote that kind of good behavior. Key West is quite fond of it’s charity events, and I think that’s great! So if you’re interested, check out the official page of the Conch Republic Independence celebration, you’ll find all sorts of good info there.

Here’s some photos from the Parade. Enjoy!

RRBedRace2010 (28 photos)
24 April 2010

Note: To see the pictures in the original Picasa album, click here

Conch Republic Bloody Battle!

Well all I have to say about this is you get an A for effort Bloody Battle People whoever you are.

But I have to admit that after all the buildup I’d heard about this event, I was expecting something that didn’t exactly land on the ground and just lie there twitching. Apparently the powers-that-be banned the use of tomatoes and bread in the fray, leaving a rather unimpressive and half-hearted battle. The toilet paper rolls streaming out of the planes overhead were a nice touch I thought, and were by far the more entertaining of the battles high points. But seriously, what’s a Conch Republic revolution without the throwing of the loaf of Cuban bread? I mean, COME ON!

I have nothing to base a comparison on, but friends who have seen this event (and even participated) in previous years, tell me that it’s nothing like it used to be, and some even suggested that the Conch Republic secede all over again so we can derail the power-hungry elite who robbed this event of it’s color and zest! Hey, who am I to stand in the way of revolution.. bring it on!

That being said, we had a good time watching the battle despite it’s lackluster performance, and we followed the crowd to Schooner Wharf afterwards for the official surrender on stage.

Here’s a few photos for your perusal..

BloodyBattle2010 (12 photos)
23 April 2010

Note: To see the pictures in the original Picasa album, click here

Conch Republic Independence Parade!

Last night was the annual Conch Republic Independence Parade, one of the many activities this week celebrating the secession of the Conch Republic from the United States 28 years ago.

Christina and I met up with our friend Eric and his wife Kelly at their place right off of Duval, grabbed a couple of chairs from around the pool and parked ourselves on the sidewalk with some frosty adult beverages.

In true Key West fashion, the parade started about an hour late, but it was a grand good time. Key West certainly loves it’s parades, and this was no exception. You gotta love a parade where people just join in and walk carrying their coolers and beers with them.

I love this city!

CRParade (38 photos)
22 April 2010

Note: To see the pictures in the original Picasa album, click here

The 28th Annual Conch Republic Independence Celebration is Underway!

I was out of town last weekend when this whole celebration kicked off with the Drag Queen Races on Duval on Saturday, so I missed all of that madness, but there’s no way I’m going to miss the upcoming events this weekend!

Friday starts off at 5:30 at Mallory Square with a Giant 7-foot Key Lime Pie. Then at 6:00 everyone gathers on Sunset Pier for the Bloody Battle Non-Combative Shore-Side Viewing Party. At 7:00 comes the main event; The Conch Republic Naval Parade & Great Battle for the Conch Republic Reenactment in Historic Key West Harbor, followed by the Victory Party at Schooner Wharf Bar. Definitely sounds like a promising Friday night in Key West!

Saturday is the The Conch Republic Craft Show and Food Fest, the Conch Crawl, and the 28th Annual Red Ribbon Bed Race down Duval St followed by The Conch Republic Fiddler’s Contest at Green Parrot Bar. The day’s events wind up with the Pirates Ball and Pig Roast back at Schooner Wharf.

Phew! How is it possible to cram all of that into a day and a half? Well, I’m going to find out. Stay tuned for a special report!

If you’re interested in the full list of events, you can find it here at the Conch Republic Website, along with a lot of other cool Conch Republic Stuff. Don’t forget to get your Conch Republic Passport!

A Momentous Occasion!

Well today I made my first ‘luxury’ purchase since being laid off almost two years ago, and it felt fantastic.

Since leaving my cushy corporate job behind, I’ve been without a decent camera. The D70 that I carried with me everywhere had to go back into the closet in the IT department, where it no doubt still sits unused and collecting dust. It was a sad day indeed.

If you’ve read some of the posts here, you’ve probably heard me complain about having to document my transgressions with the pitiful camera in my iPhone.. well those days are behind us dear readers.. Daddy has a new toy.

Now if I can just manage to NOT drop in the marina, everything will be fine.